Little Bit of Your Heart
by i-can-see-the-stars
Summary: Facing the reality of a failing relationship, Roman has to decide how to feel about Dean while simultaneously dealing with budding feelings for a new man. Ambreigns/Rolleigns with side relationships.
1. Just a Little Bit

ariana grande was on permanent repeat as i wrote this. i'm just trying this out, so tell me if you like it!

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><p>Roman's eyes fluttered open, blinking to adjust to the bright morning light. The curtains were open, meaning Dean hadn't come home, because he couldn't stand having the curtains open. Roman rolled onto his back and wasn't surprised to see Dean's side of the bed empty. He sighed and dragged himself out of bed and into the bathroom, carrying on with his morning routine. As he made to leave the bathroom, Roman stopped to look in the mirror.<p>

The dark circles under his eyes were getting worse. His eyes were dull, and with his hair pulled off his face, Roman could see how pale he'd gotten. He just looked tired. He'd barely get any sleep nowadays, between work and waiting for Dean, when he only came home every now and then. Roman sighed and shook his head, leaving the bathroom in he and Dean's room and going downstairs. He made a beeline for the kitchen, making a pot of coffee mostly on instinct. Roman heard the front door opening, and in strode Dean, shirt wrinkled, blonde hair rumpled, blue eyes bright, painfully blissed-out. Roman felt his heart ache at the sight.

"Hey baby," Dean greeted. He gave Roman a kiss that tasted like alcohol and someone else, but Roman didn't pull away.

"Hi," Roman said, watching as Dean poured himself a cup of coffee. "Hey, uh, where were you last night? I tried to stay up waiting for you, but, y'know."

Dean gave him a confused look from behind his mug, but his face smoothed out as he got what Roman was saying. "Just went out last night. Phil didn't want me driving home."

_Phil doesn't fucking drink_, Roman thought. _That bastard won't even step foot a bar_.

Part of Roman wanted to start pressing further, seeing as Dean had been "out" four times that week, but he decided against it. Dean was a professional liar, quite simply. Roman knew the truth, though. Dean was with someone, who it was Roman didn't know (he certainly had an idea), but Dean hadn't been coming home because of that person. Roman couldn't help himself as he kissed Dean's cheek before he walked back upstairs, changing into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and going downstairs once more.

"Leaving already?" Dean asked, walking out of the kitchen with his second cup of coffee but without his shirt. Roman struggled to keep his eyes on Dean's face.

"Yeah, I gotta go meet Paige and Dolph," Roman said, shrugging on his jacket and pulling on his shoes.

"Are they together?"

"Dean, I've told you, Dolph's gay and Paige is dating Baron."

Dean shrugged and ambled over to Roman, placing his coffee cup on the table by the door before pulling Roman closer by his jacket. He dove right into a kiss, Roman's arms automatically wrapping around Dean's broad shoulders. Dean's tongue ran along the seam of Roman's lips, and Roman didn't hesitate to open his mouth, but he pulled away as the taste of coffee and whiskey and something musky hit him.

"Oops, morning breath, sorry," Dean chuckled, pecking Roman on the lips one last time.

"Uh, yeah," Roman nodded, grabbing his phone and putting it in his pocket. He got his keys and his bag and left the house, walking to his car and getting inside. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, pulling it out and answering as he saw Dolph's name. "Hello."

"My brother," Dolph greeted. "I swear to god, Paige's boyfriend is disgusting. Keeps looking at her like she's a piece of meat."

"They're dating, Dolph, that's the look of love," Roman said, pulling out of his driveway and into the street. "Sometimes you look at the love of your life like they're food."

"Ah, no wonder I'm always drooling when I look at your ass," Dolph chuckled. "It's nothing but meat."

Roman actually had to rest his face on the steering wheel with how hard he was laughing. "Jesus, man, have you no shame?"

"Where has shame gotten anyone?" Dolph's end of the line got quiet, until Roman heard Paige's voice on the other end.

"You're on speaker, so stop talking about butts."

Roman chuckled. "Hi, Paige," He said. "So, Baron's there?"

"Yup," Roman heard a "hi" from Paige's boyfriend. "I figured we could make this a double date."

"I'm not dating Dolph, though."

Speaking of, Dolph scoffed. "Yeah, like your boyfriend's ever here. I might as well be your boyfriend."

"You only want me for my ass," Roman joked, looking for a parking spot.

"I can't find the lie."

"Dolph, hush," Paige said. "Roman, tell me the truth; did Dean come home last night?"

Roman stayed quiet until he pulled into a space. He scrubbed a hand over his face, sighing. "No."

Paige was the one who sighed. "Roman..."

"It's nothing," Roman said simply, getting out of his car. "He showed up, like, five minutes after I woke up, but at least he came home."

"That doesn't change the fact that he was out the entire night," Paige said. "He's playing you."

"I'm not accusing him of anything until I have proof that he's doing something," Roman opened the door to the cafe he was meeting Paige, Dolph, and Baron at. "Hey, I'm here, gotta go." He hung up and walked to the table, sitting next to Dolph.

"Hey, stud," Dolph smiled up at Roman. "Got you your favorite."

"How sweet of you," Roman bumped Dolph with his shoulder before picking up his coffee and taking a sip.

"Roman," Paige's voice had a warning tone to it, and Roman almost didn't want to meet eyes with the young woman. "What's with Dean?"

"He's been showing up at home later and later. It used to just be the middle of the night, but now he's getting there after I wake up," Roman explained. "He's spending the night somewhere."

"Probably with some_one_," Baron said. "Has he said anything?"

"No," Roman looked down at the table. "He could be with someone, yeah. But at least I have him with me."

"You shouldn't be thinking like that-"

"I've been with him for four years, Paige," Roman snapped. "I don't know what's happening. And I sure as hell don't want to think about it."

They ate breakfast in silence and walked to the tattoo shop, seeing as it was less than a block away. It was their usual morning routine. Baron had only recently started to work with them, having worked at some clothing store Paige liked before she dragged him to the tattoo shop and got him a job. Their boss, Mark, a big, tall, tattooed guy, took an instant liking to Baron, probably because Baron himself was also big and tattooed. And, you know, he was a fantastic artist.

Paige did the piercings, a newer addition to the shop that Mark had introduced after his wife, Michelle, had suggested it. Paige and Baron were a nearly perfect couple; Roman was happy for them. And Dolph, well, Dolph had bleach blonde hair and no tattoos, but he was cute and friendly and the only person that could work at the front desk. Roman did tattoos, too, but he worked mainly on the more basic stuff.

Everyone split up and went to their separate stations, but Roman sat behind the counter with Dolph; he didn't have any scheduled appointments. He grabbed one of the binders with tattoo ideas and started flipping through it.

"Thinking of getting another one?" Dolph asked, pulling up the appointments for the day.

"Nah, just looking," Roman answered. "Kinda wanna try out something new, y'know? See if I can broaden my horizons."

Dolph laughed, and Roman gave him the finger. The bell above the door rung, and Roman went back to looking at the book.

"Corey, man, what's up?" Dolph asked, completely dropping his front desk demeanor. Corey was a regular at the shop.

"Gonna ink my neck," Corey cheesed, handing Dolph the picture of his tattoo.

"Oh, that's badass, man," Roman commented, looking at the picture over Dolph's shoulder. "On your neck, too?"

"Mhm," Corey said. He glanced behind him, prompting both Roman and Dolph to look in that direction. "Oh, yeah, guys, this is Seth."

Roman felt his breath catch. He hadn't even seen Seth come in. He had big brown eyes and long, two-toned hair, and he was quite obviously well-built under his tight t-shirt. Roman's eyes met Seth's for a few seconds, before Seth's face turned a light shade of pink and he looked down. Roman shouldn't have found him so attractive. His heart shouldn't have been beating as fast as it was. Roman was with Dean. He was supposed to feel that way about Dean, not some random guy that came into the shop with Corey.

No feelings. Loyal to Dean. Hot guy that hangs out with Corey is just a hot guy that hangs out with Corey. Nothing else. He had Dean...sometimes. But at least he had Dean.

"I'm Dolph," The blonde introduced himself, holding his hand out towards Seth's. Seth shook it with a smile.

"I'm Roman," Roman held out his own hand, Seth shaking it, and Roman couldn't help but notice how much bigger his hand was than Seth's. "You getting anything today?"

"Oh, uh, no," Seth said, looking up at Roman and smiling ever-so-slightly. Roman smiled back, and Seth looked down again.

Corey gave Dolph a knowing look that Roman just barely caught. He was still puzzled, though. "Seth, I thought you wanted to get something touched up?"

"Well, I-"

"Roman's free right now. He could do it," Dolph interjected, taking the binder from Roman and all but pushing him off the stool. "Corey's gonna take a while, it couldn't hurt to do it."

Seth looked at Roman, lips parted, very visibly confused by whatever was happening. "...I guess I could use a touch-up."

Dolph smiled and shoved Roman away from the counter. "Off with you!"

Roman rolled his eyes, watching as Corey went to Baron's station and leading Seth to his own. He took a seat, motioning for Seth to sit down. "So, whatcha got?"

Seth reached down and pulled the elastic off his wrist, pacing it on his other arm before holding it out to Roman. "This bad boy."

Roman took Seth's wrist in his hand, gently running his thumb over the ink. It was what looked like a little piece of paper, burning, with the word "forever" on it. Roman nodded and ran his thumb over the tattoo once more, releasing his wrist soon after.

"Nice," He said, glancing up at Seth briefly. The other man's face was that same shadenof pink; he sure was a bashful thing. Roman turned around and grabbed his tattoo gun. "Just wanna darken it up?"

"Yeah," Seth answered, watching as Roman got the tool ready.

"Awesome," A minute later, Roman was ready, and he took Seth's wrist in his hand once more. "Ready?"

Seth nodded, and Roman let the needle rest against Seth's tan wrist.

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><p>i listened to "just a little bit of your heart" by ariana grande, and something in me just felt like this was necessary to write. this <em>will<em> be a chapter story! i'll go back to regular updates of everything else (as if i don't have enough stuff as it is), i've just been busy lately. thanks for reading, reviews are welcome!


	2. Losing Trust

"That Seth guy was pretty cute, huh?"

Roman rolled his eyes and turned the page of the binder. He'd finished up with Seth rather quickly (touch-ups were his unfortunate forte), but Seth had stuck around and talked to him until Corey was done. He seemed nice enough, with a nice little gap-toothed smile and a weird addiction for Crossfit, which Roman actually found oddly endearing. It was a general I-just-met-you-and-now-I'm-being-nice conversation, nothing too outstanding.

But, to answer Dolph's question, Seth was cute. If he and Roman made eye contact for longer than five seconds, he would blush and look away, the smallest hints of a smile on his face. He'd tuck his hair behind his ear instead of just pulling it all back. He had big, pretty brown eyes that just about lit up when he started talking about stuff he liked. He also had a habit of shutting himself up if he talked too much, which Roman found strange, but he didn't question it, as much as he wanted to. Roman, quite simply, was interested in Seth. Part of him contemplated asking for the other man's number before he left, but he decided against it. What if he wasn't gay? What if he was dating someone?

_Dating someone._

Yeah, Roman had Dean. And he was happy, no doubt. Roman loved Dean. Problem was, Roman wasn't too sure how Dean felt about him. He'd go against his better judgement and blame Dean's lack of expression on his other relationships - since he'd had a few of them - but Roman knew he was just lying to himself. Though, part of him just couldn't bear the thought of betraying Dean.

"Hm?"

"What?" Roman looked up from the book, receiving a disapproving look from Dolph.

"Seth," The blonde repeated, taking the book from Roman and placing it on the counter. "Cute?"

"Well, like, he's nice-"

"I didn't ask that," Dolph interjected. "Do you think he's cute?"

Roman looked down, twiddling his fingers in his lap. "I guess..."

"You guess?"

"Dolph, I'm with Dean," Roman said tiredly, looking up at Dolph. "What does it matter if I find Seth attractive?"

"It means you find him attractive, you moron," Dolph sighed. "You think he's cute. You talked to him for, like, three hours. Most people who just met don't have three hour conversations."

"That doesn't mean anything!" Roman exclaimed.

"Why is this so hard for you to talk about?"

"I told you, I'm with Dean," Roman said, looking back down at his lap. "Even if I did like Seth, I couldn't do anything about it. I'm with Dean and I know nothing about Seth's love life."

"It's non-existent, but it involves dudes," Dolph said matter-of-factly, leaning back against the counter. "That means you have a chance."

"How do you know this stuff?" Roman asked.

"Corey," Dolph stated simply.

Roman shrugged. "I don't need a chance."

"Fine," Dolph said, throwing his hands in the air. "That's great. But you're also going on a date with him."

"What?"

"Don't question it," Dolph said, handing Roman the binder back as Baron's other customer came in.

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><p>After work, Roman decided to hit up his favorite gym before he went home. He was in no rush to actually go home, and he hadn't been to the gym in nearly two days, so what would it hurt? Roman made it home by 8:30, and he fully intended to just shower and go to sleep. Dean probably wasn't gonna be home anyways.<p>

Underline, probably.

Roman walked in, placing his bag down and slipping off his shoes. He tossed his bag in the laundry room as he made his way through the house, letting his hair out of its bun when he stepped into his bedroom (it was practically only his, it's not like Dean ever slept in there). Like always, he meant to make a beeline for the bathroom, until he saw someone on the bed and nearly had a heart attack.

"Hey, calm down baby, it's just me," Dean chuckled, sitting up and facing Roman. "I got home early. And, y'know, since you're usually home by six, I thought I'd be able to meet you here."

"Well, you're usually not here, so I went to the gym," Roman said, peeing off his tank top and walking to the bathroom.

Any other significant other would've said something, even if it was a minor little comment. Dean, though, just let a guilty look spread across his face as he broke eye contact with Roman. The older man turned and entered the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He turned the water in and waited for it to get hot, bracing himself against the sink. Something about the look on Dean's face just didn't sit right with Roman. He was definitely guilty of something, but Roman couldn't tell if he felt bad about not being home or something completely different.

Shaking his head, Roman stripped off his shorts and underwear before stepping into the shower. He sighed as the hot water hit his skin, nearly instantly soothing his tired muscles. He was need his hair and was just rinsing the last of his body wash off when, over the spray of the water, he heard the door opening. A few moments later Dean was joining him in the shower.

"You always have it so hot," Dean chastised, turning the water temperature down. "You're hot enough, water ain't doing anything."

Roman couldn't help but laugh quietly, feeling Dean's arms slip around his midsection. "What are you doing?"

"Do you know when the last time we had sex was?" Dean asked, reaching around Roman and turning the water off.

Roman actually didn't know, which made it that much worse. "No..."

"Four weeks, Roman," Dean pushed the curtain aside and pulled Roman out of the shower. "That's a month. And its too long."

Dean dragged Roman into the bedroom, apparently not caring about soaking the bed when he pushed Roman onto it, climbing on top of Roman soon after. In that moment, Roman didn't care about his suspicions or Dean not being home, no, he just surged up and captured Dean's lips in his own. Dean kissed back without hesitation, rolling his hips against Roman's. The bigger man rolled them over, Dean whimpering as Roman pinned his arms down above his head.

"No."

"No?" Dean looked like a kicked puppy, lips parting in surprise as Roman let go of his wrists and got out of bed.

Closing the door behind him, Roman walked into the bathroom. He couldn't get that far with Dean. The truth wasn't fun, because they really hadn't had sex in a month, but that's them. Romn didn't know what Dean was doing. Didn't know where he was, or what he was up to, or who he was with. Dean wasn't just spending the night with someone. Roman hated admitting it, but he knew he wasn't the only person in Dean's life.

He braced his hands on the counter, taking a deep breath. Fuck, he wasn't even hard anymore. The one night he finally gets his man to himself, and Roman can't even stay for a blowjob. Paige had been spewing crap about Dean for days now. As much as he hated to admit it, Roman's trust in Dean had been diminishing.

"Babe, you alright?" Dean asked, coming into the bathroom clad in only a pair of sweatpants, handing Roman a pair of his own.

"Yeah, I just have a little headache," Roman said, slipping on his sweats.

Dean wrapped his arms around Roman's waist, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. "You need anything?"

Roman shook his head. "Can we just go to sleep? I still wanna be near you."

Dean smiled, taking Roman by the hand and leading him into the bedroom. Roman lied down first, Dean cuddling up on his side. Roman wrapped an arm around Dean's shoulders, pulling the younger man closer to him. Dean placed a kiss right at the base of Roman's neck.

"I love you," Roman said softly, kissing Dean's forehead..

"Mm...love you too," Dean mumbled.

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><p><em>"Fuck...fuck...fuck..." The man on top of Roman moaned in a mantra, head thrown back, bouncing on his cock like his life depended on it. <em>

_Roman grabbed the man's hips, bucking up into the man's willing body. The other only moaned louder, his hands covering Roman's while he contributed to bounce. Roman was moaning too, a name, but something just couldn't pinpoint it. The man above him's voice was familiar but barely recognizable. It was more than likely Dean, maybe. All Roman knew was that the man above him was a champ at riding a dick. _

_That painfully familiar voice kept ringing in Roman's ears, Roman's name among the words being spilled from that mouth. Speaking of mouths, the man leaned down, and Roman only caught a glimpse of the man's face before his lips were captured in a kiss. Roman's grip on the guy's hips only tightened, his bucking getting harder. The man moaned into Roman's mouth, his tongue begging for entrance into Roman's mouth. Roman opened his mouth gladly, but the lips against his disappeared moments later. _

_"Fuck, I'm gonna cum," The voice whimpered, bouncing even harder as he chased his orgasm. _

_"Me too, baby, I'm right there," Roman groaned. _

_The man continued bouncing, until he stilled altogether, his lips parting in a near-scream as he came. Roman was right behind him, his hips stilling as he released inside of the smaller man. The other man, panting, laid down and rested his head on Roman's chest. As they both came down, Roman pushed the man's damp, long and two-toned hair off his face, hazy brown eyes and a tired smile greeting him. _

_"Shit, Rome," The man's breaths were slowing down, his finger tracing random patterns on Roman's stomach. _

_"Yeah," Roman nodded. "You're so good, Seth."_

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><p>Roman sat straight up, panting, slightly sweaty, and guiltily aware of the dampness in his sweats. He looked to the his left, Dean's side of the bed empty, then to the right, his clock reading 11:00. He nearly threw himself out of bed, but he soon remembered that it was Thursday (the shop's most deserted day of the week), and he didn't need to go in until noon. Roman scrubbed a hand over his face and got out of bed.<p>

He had a fucking wet dream. About Seth. Having a wet dream was acceptable, seeing as Roman had gone four long weeks without having sex and was just about going through withdrawal, but about Seth? Roman hadn't even seen him with his shirt off. He'd talked to him for three hours - which didn't constitute Roman having a wet dream - but here he was. A fucking mess in his sweatpants and the image of Seth bouncing on his dick a permanent fixture in his mind.

After a quick shower and a cup of coffee, Roman had calmed himself down. He found a note in the kitchen from Dean (went to work, hope you feel better, in his messy scrawl). Dean worked at an auto shop, and - surprisingly - was in charge. Mostly because Dean was clumsy and a little jittery, and they could _not_ leave Enzo Amore - a small, loud man with fucking _cheetah print_ hair - or Colin Cassidy - a big, tall, goofy guy - in charge of anything.

At 11:45, Roman decided to leave for work. He got there pretty quickly, but Paige had a knack for getting everywhere early, so Roman just walked right in. Paige was stifling on the counter, looking at some tattoo magazine that they had just gotten.

"Hey, London bridges," Roman greeted, waking behind the counter and sitting in Dolph's usual spot.

"Hey," Paige said, closing the magazine and setting it down. "Dean come home?"

"Actually, he did," Roman couldn't help but smile.

"Aw, that's good," Paige put a hand on Roman's shoulder. "Tell me you guys did something romantic."

"Almost," Roman said, watching as Paige rolled her eyes. "What?"

"Don't tell me he didn't try anything."

"No! No, he did," Roman said quickly. "I just..."

"Chickened out?" Paige asked.

"Not exactly," Roman answered. "I couldn't, y'know? Like, I love him and we haven't had sex in a month-"

"Too much!" Paige yelled, covering her ears.

"You asked!" Roman said, Paige uncovering her ears. "Anyways, I wanted to, but it didn't feel right."

Paige nodded, patting Roman's shoulder. She opened her mouth to say something else, but the bell on the door rang, and Baron and Dolph walked in. Roman went to his station, opting to talk to Paige later (and maybe Dolph, since he wasn't grossed out by talking about sex). He took a seat, ready to forget about everything that didn't involve work. Until...

"Hi, Randy!"

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><p>any guesses about what randy's got to do with roman? or why dean had no problem with roman turning him down? reviews are appreciated!<p> 


	3. No More

Roman tensed and stood up, leaving his station to look at the front counter. Of course, there Randy was, a big smile on his face as he talked to Dolph. Roman hadn't seen Randy in almost a year. They weren't exactly on good terms when Randy left all that time ago, but Roman still felt his heart fluttering a little. He looked good, still as tall and as broad as ever, but he looked like he had more muscle than he ever did. His smile looked a bit brighter, his blue eyes practically twinkling. Wherever he went off to, it had certainly done him good.

When Roman first moved to Chicago with Dean, Randy had been the first person Roman really connected with. Randy was Roman's first actual boyfriend, and the longest-lasting one to date (at nearly five years, but Dean was quickly catching up). They always remained friends, even after they broke up. Randy ended up being between places, going back and fourth between Chicago and St. Louis for nearly two years. By that time, Roman had begun to date Dean, but Randy wasn't a fan of it. He moved to St. Louis permanently, but moved somewhere else soon after.

Randy had these incredible blue eyes, and an amazing smile, and Roman would be lying if he said he wasn't feeling something for the older man. It was just remanents, though, and Roman knew that. Even Randy had admitted to feeling things, too. Randy started making his way further back into the shop, but Roman didn't bother to move. Randy's smile only grew as he caught sight of Roman, prompting a smile to break out on Roman's face as well.

"Jesus, Rome, look at you," Randy said quietly, pulling Roman in for a tight hug. "I missed you."

"I missed you too," Roman said, pulling back slightly to look Randy in the eye. "Where've you been?"

"Uh, wow, let's see," Randy chuckled. "I went to St. Louis, was there for about two months, and then my friend made me go see him in North Carolina, and I met someone, and ended up in Georgia."

"World traveler," Roman commented. "So, who'd you meet?"

"This guy, his name's Cody," Randy said. "He came with me, but he's at the hotel right now."

"Alright. So, you just here to talk, or...?"

"Actually, I have a job for you," Randy guided Roman towards his station, sitting down and rolling up his sleeve. "I wanna get this filled in better."

Roman smiled as he looked down at the familiar rose tattoo on Randy's arm. It was the only thing he had colored on his arm, but the red had always been a little off. Randy had promised Roman years ago that he'd get it fixed up - Roman hated sloppy tattoos - but he apparently never did. He held his arm out towards Roman, the younger man tracing the flower with his finger.

"All these years and it still looks like shit," Roman laughed as Randy punched him again, and a few minutes later, he was filling in the red tattoo.

"Hey, so, how're you and Dean?" Randy asked, obviously accustomed to the sting of getting inked.

"We're good," Roman said, trying to sound as honest as possible.

"Really?"

"Yeah, why wouldn't we be?"

"Well, y'know, with Dean fucking Cena and all that, I thought you'd be a little uncomfortable," Randy shrugged. "You've always been a cool ex. Maybe I'm just thinking out loud."

Roman almost dropped the tattoo gun. He tightened his grip on the tool, willing the sudden shaking of his hands to go away. His eyes started stinging with tears. He'd forgotten about Cena. He was a newer guy at the shop, and Dean only mentioned him in a passing manner every once and a while, so Roman never really though of it. If anything, Roman expected Punk, but he was good enough friends with Phil to know he wouldn't do that to him. That, and Phil was engaged to a girl named AJ.

John Cena. He was pretty good looking, but nothing Dean ever expressed being into, which mad that moment hurt that much more. Was Roman that bad? That Dean had to sleep with someone he had no prior interest in? The one good thing Roman managed to find was the fact that he'd denied Dean the night before. Dean hadn't missed out on sex for a month. Dean had missed out on sex with Roman, because he was too busy with John. Roman's heart started aching.

His man. His best friend. His boyfriend. The guy he'd known for 15 years running. The guy who promised that he'd never cheat, that he was beyond that. They guy who promised him a future. All lies. Dean was just a liar.

"Rome? You alright, baby?"

Roman nodded, taking a deep breath that was too shaky for comfort. "I'm alright, it's just a little bit of a sore subject."

"Yeah, I get that," Randy said. "Couldn't talk about you for a while. I mean, I could talk _to_ you, but if anyone asked, I couldn't."

"Yeah," Roman nodded numbly. "It's just like that..."

* * *

><p>"I dunno, man, like, did you see his face? Have you ever looked at him? God, he's so attractive."<p>

Corey chuckled as Seth threw himself back onto the couch, letting out a heavy sigh. Seth was having quite the crisis because of Roman. It was just, his _face_. And _him_. Seth hadn't had a boyfriend for nearly two years, and he hadn't even had feelings for anyone for even longer. But Roman had made him feel stuff that he hadn't felt for a while. He wasn't letting himself get too into Roman, though. Seth didn't know what Roman liked, he didn't know if he was with someone or if he wasn't into guys (or just not into Seth). The uncertainty was almost a deal-breaker for Seth, but that only made him want to get to know Roman more.

"You've got it bad, don't you?" Corey asked, crossing his arms over his chest and looking at the man laying on his, well, their couch (Corey had been the one to buy it, and they lived together, but it technically was Corey's).

"He's so pretty," Seth groaned, rolling over and burying his face in the cushions.

"I know, Seth, I've known him for a few months now," Corey patted Seth on the back, standing up and getting his phone off the kitchen counter. "You want his number?"

"What?" Seth's head, hair sticking up messily, popped up from behind the arm of the couch. "You have it?"

"Yeah, dude," Corey said, pulling up Roman's contact. "See?"

Seth took Corey's phone, quickly sending Roman's number to his phone. Corey let out a snort of a laugh, and Seth glared up at him from his spot on the couch. Seth almost immediately sent Roman a text, until logic actually got the better of him. He didn't know Roman. If he texted him out of the blue, it'd be weird. Or would it? Seth began typing a message, but quickly locked his phone and put it on the coffee table. _Keep your composure_, Seth thought. _He works at the same place, just talk to him in person._

"So, what?" Corey asked. "You just wanna get with him or something?"

"What? No," Seth said quickly. "Dude, yeah, he's fucking gorgeous, but he's...sweet. Like, he let me talk. He never told me to shut up. He's-"

"You do know that I know him, right? And I know he's kinda an angel on earth and too nice for his own good."

"Was that a warning?"

"That was me giving you a rundown," Corey said, taking his phone back. "He's a great guy. I'll talk to Dolph and see what I can do for you."

"Thank you," Seth pulled his knees up to his chest, resting his chin on them. His eyes were trained on his phone, but he never reached for it.

"Willpower at its very finest," Corey patted the top of Seth's head and walked back towards his room.

* * *

><p>Roman walked into he and Dean's house at 7:45, blissfully forgetful of what he'd found out about earlier that day. Dolph had insisted on them going on a "date," which they did and awful lot, mostly because he could ask Roman uncomfortable questions without getting beat up. Roman explained the whole situation to the other man, and Dolph's only plan was "make him jealous," which, no, was not a good idea. Tempting, but not a good idea. Seth was the one person Dolph recommended, which was no surprise.<p>

It should've hurt more than it did. Roman should've been curled up in a ball surrounded by everything he and Dean ever shared. That's how break-ups worked, right? At least, the cheating kind. Him and Randy had a mutual thing, neither really wanting what the other wanted. But Dean cheated on him. Better yet, he'd lie about it. Roman couldn't help but feel guilty for the way he was feeling. Even if Dean was cheating on him, Roman still felt like he was obligated to care about Dean. And by not feeling any kind of mind-numbing pain that most people feel, Roman felt like he was betraying Dean in some way.

He nearly laughed at the thought. If anything, he'd only benefit from betraying Dean, seeing as the other man had already done it to him. Roman fished his phone out of his pocket, unlocking it and pulling up Dean's contact. Calling him couldn't hurt.

_"Hello?"_

"Hey, babe," Roman said, making his way up the stairs and into the bedroom. "Where are you?"

_"What? Oh, uh..."_ Clothes were rustling in the background._ "Just, uh, just out with Cass and Enzo. These two can't be left alone, you know?"_

Lies. "Okay. Do you have time to talk?"

Dean let out a short sigh. _"Yeah, of course, baby."_

"Awesome," Roman rolled his eyes. "So, guess who I saw today."

_"Who?"_

"Randy," Dean hated Randy. Between he and Roman dating, and him not wanting Dean and Roman to date. "He's back for a little bit."

_"Is that so?"_ Roman heard footsteps, and a door closing. _"What'd he say? Where did he even go?"_

"He went to St. Louis, and then North Carolina, and then to Georgia. It seems like a lot to me, but it's Randy," Roman said. "He said he missed me." Last time Roman listened to Dolph, ever. This jealousy stuff just wasn't him.

There were more footsteps, and a door closing, and a car door closing. Wherever Dean was, he was leaving. _"I'm leaving these two idiots,"_ Dean muttered. _"I want your clothes off. No more Randy, you understand me?"_

"Yes, sir," Roman teased.

_"God, you're so much,"_ Dean just hung up the phone after that. Roman chuckled.

The jealousy shit wasn't Roman's thing, but it wasn't hard to make Dean jealous. Ever. While Roman was pretty easy-going - he'd quite simply watched his boyfriend cheat on him for nearly a month, for christ's sake - Dean was the complete opposite. At least, when it came to exes. After Roman dated Randy, he had a short fling with a guy named Tyler, and to this day, Dean would still punch his lights out if he came within 10 feet of Roman. Roman had asked Dean about it before, but all he really got out of anything was the word "mine." Understandably so, though. Dean had never had much, let alone a boyfriend or girlfriend as serious as Roman. He couldn't just let someone take that from him.

Roman and Dean had been best friends for fifteen years, pretty much a fifteen year relationship, just without the dating stuff. They bumped heads alot, mainly in the bedroom. But roman knew he wouldn't be happier with anyone else. He could protect Dean, and Dean wanted to be protected. It gave Roman closure. And whatever made Roman happy, evidently made Dean happy. They basically lived for each other.

At least, that's what Roman thought.

10 minutes later, Dean was walking into the house, while Roman laying down completely naked, just like his boyfriend had said. Dean made his way into the bedroom sans-shirt and struggling to get his belt off, especially when he caught sight of Roman. Even when he was very obviously angry, he stopped altogether just to stare at Roman; his cheeks pink, lips parted, and Roman couldn't help but smirk. Dean managed to fumble the rest of his clothes off and get on the bed in less than a minute. As he got on the bed, Dean went right ahead and pushed Roman's knees up toward his shoulders.

"They're gonna be up there anyways," Dean said, leaning down and kissing Roman as he simultaneously reached up onto the nightstand for the lube. "I love you so much, you know that? Randy doesn't deserve you."

Roman nodded breathlessly, feeling Dean almost hesitate before he pushed a finger into Roman. Even Dean groaned at the feeling. Roman pressed the side of his face into the pillow, Dean already pushing in a second finger. That night wasn't a night for wasting time, and Roman knew it. Dean was going to rush, and he was going to get Roman as soon as he could. It was the same way the night Roman and Dean had ran into Tyler at a bar. Soon Dean was thrusting three fingers inside of Roman, just barely missing his prostate. Roman groaned every time Dean was _right there_, but not _there_, making Dean chuckle quietly.

"Think you're ready?" Dean asked, kissing the inside of Roman's thigh.

Roman nodded. "Please."

"What was that?" A shit-eating grin plastered itself onto Dean's face, and Roman, in his mostly lust-ridden haze, rolled his eyes.

"Please," Roman whined. "Fuck me before I kick you out of bed."

Dean laughed and slathered a bit more lube on his - oh, wow, completely neglected - cock, lining himself up with Roman's hole. He pushed in slowly, pressing little kisses all over Roman's face as he went. Thanks to going over a month without bottoming, Roman was insanely tight (Dean could hardly breathe, it felt so good), but Dean could also see the older man wincing beneath him. He stopped when he was fully inside of his boyfriend, watching as Roman's eyes fluttered open and then back closed, mouth opening in a moan.

"Good god, Rome..." Dean groaned, slowly pulling out of Roman before thrusting back in. "You're so fucking perfect..."

Roman felt his face heating up. He'd missed that feeling so much; Dean inside of him, filling him uo to the point where it was almost too good, but Roman always managed. And Dean, no matter what kind of mood he was in, always made sure Roman was comfortable. His thrusts got a little faster and harder, making Roman arch up involuntarily as the head of Dean's cock just barely brushed over his spot. He gripped Dean's hair in one hand, his other gripping Dean's shoulder hard enough to leave a mark. Dean leaned down and pressed his lips to Roman's in a messy kiss that was mostly just teeth and tongue and Dean's thrusts making Roman move under him.

"Harder," Roman mumbled against Dean's lips, his hands moving to hold Dean's face. "Fuck me like you mean it."

Dean was the one groaning that time, leaning down and burying his face in Roman's neck as he sped up his thrusts. And he hit Roman's spot _every single time_. "I love you."

"I love you too," Roman moaned, wrapping his legs around Dean's slim waist. "I'm so close."

"Me too, baby," Dean started stroking Roman at a fast and sloppy pace, feeling it throb in his hand. "Let me see you let go."

With that, Roman did. He let out a moan loud enough to have them kicked out of a hotel, his nails inadvertently sinking into Dean's sides. His cum shot out and splattered he and dean's stomachs. Dean's thrusts faltered for the slightest moment and he was coming as well, biting down on Roman's shoulder in an attempt to muffle his own moan. After a few minutes, Dean lifted himself off of Roman and padded over to the bathroom, coming back with a damn washcloth and cleaning Roman up. He threw the cloth somewhere near the bathroom and climbed back in bed with Roman.

"You good?" Dean asked, laying his head on Roman's chest.

"Fantastic," Roman said, a tired smile on his face as he carded a hand through Dean's hair. "So, Randy gets you that wound up, huh?"

"Shut up."

"Okay, I was just gonna tell you that I'm going to lunch with him tomorrow."

"I will stay home and fuck you all day if it means keeping you away frm him," Dean didn't even lift his head up.

"I was kidding," Roman tugged lightly on one of Dean's curls. "I love you, and you only."

Dean's arm tightened around Roman's waist as he pressed a kiss to Roman's neck. "I love you too."

Dean dozed off within minutes, leaving Roman awake and alone with his thoughts. He wasn't Dean's only. But Dean was his, and at least he had that. His phone buzzed on the side table and he reached over to get it. For a split second he though whoever was texting him was insane, but it was only 9:30, and, evidently, the perfect time for Dolph to text him.

_seth's up for a date, if you're interested_

* * *

><p>the truth is revealed! dean's a cheater! seth's got a crush on roman! this chapter was the first one to actually give me writer's block! yay! reviews are welcome!<p> 


	4. Forget It

late update. very late update.

* * *

><p>Roman's eyes opened, squinting against the bright morning light. He wondered if Dean had already left or was still asleep, and with one look down, Roman's answer was the latter. Dean's face was nuzzled in Roman's neck, a strong arm wrapped around Roman's midsection while one of his legs tangled with Roman's. Roman smiled softly at the sight. He hadn't seen it in well over a month, so it made his heart bloom with warmth and love and all the things he <em>shouldn't<em> be feeling towards Dean. The man in his arms was a cheater. The man in his arms had laid in another man's arms for a solid month. Dean wasn't his anymore.

Sighing, Roman began to sit up, hearing Dean grumble. The younger man's arms tightened around him, mumbling an incoherent protest before settling back down. Roman decided he wasn't winning, so he reached over and grabbed his phone from the nightstand. Dolph's text was still on his lock screen, the ever-so-exciting message still unread. Roman unlocked his phone and typed out a quick message to Dolph, making sure to turn the volume off on his phone.

_**Tell him I'm down**_

_No_. It wasn't a good idea. He had Dean, like, partially. Going on a date with Seth would make Roman no better than Dean, and he wasn't too keen on the idea of cheating. But was it cheating when you're already being cheated on? When you have plans of breaking up? Well, Roman didn't necessarily have _plans_, he just decided he'd confront Dean at some point. Roman didn't know if he had the strength to do that to Dean. No matter what he did, Dean had his heart. It sucked, but it was true. Roman erased the text and typed another.

_**He wants to go on a date?**_

He set his phone on the nightstand once more and scrubbed a hand over his face. He was laying in bed with a man that had no interest in him anymore. Damn, did thinking of it hurt. Roman didn't want to think of a life without Dean. He hadn't had a life without Dean in 15 years. He wasn't ready to just end it. Seth was a great guy, though. Maybe one date wouldn't hurt. It was just a date, nothing to worry about. Roman didn't need to think too hard.

"You need to work on this waking up shit," Dean mumbled groggily, lifting his head up from Roman's neck. His eyes were still a little blank and hazy, and his hair was sticking up in all directions.

"I need to get to work, you little shit," Roman smoothed down Dean's hair and kissed his forehead, untangling himself from the smaller man and standing up. He winced as he took a step forward.

A sleepy chuckle came from the bed, Dean's face snuggled into Roman's pillow. "If anyone asks, tell them your loving boyfriend loved you enough to give you a limp," His words started slurring by the end of the sentence, and he dozed off soon after.

Roman shook his head and - Jesus Christ, he was gonna castrate Dean - limped his way to the bathroom. His ass hurt something awful, and he briefly regretted letting Dean go so hard when Roman hadn't bottomed in over a month. He took a quick shower, got dressed, and left the house without eating breakfast (he'd make Dolph buy him something), seeing as he was already late. By the time he made it to the shop, he was 15 minutes late and getting smacked in the chest with the newspaper.

"You, my friend, are late," Dolph said, dragging Roman behind the counter. "You're lucky you don't have an appointment today."

"I got a little held up," Roman said, trying to hide his grimace as he sat down.

"Uh-huh," Dolph smirked at him. "Tell Dean to take it easy."

Roman blushed. "So, uh...Seth-"

"Oh my god, he wants to go out!" Dolph said quickly, placing his hands on aRoman's shoulders. "Like, a lot. According to Corey, he's got the biggest nerd-boner for you, so you're gonna go on a thousand dates with him."

"You're more excited than I am, aren't you?"

"'Cause he actually sees how badly you need a new boyfriend," Paige's voice chimed in, the pale girl walking up and sitting on the counter. "Or, at least, no more Dean."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Roman asked, raising an eyebrow as he looked at Paige.

"You need someone new. Better."

"Seth."

Paige pointed at Dolph. "Precisely."

"Rome, we care about you-"

"And you continue to remind me," Roman deadpanned. "Dolph, you know he's cheating. Randy's best friends with John, so he knows for sure. Dean's cheating and that hurts like hell, but I expected it."

"You can't expect the love of your life leaving you, Roman," Paige interjected, arms crossed.

Roman rolled his eyes, leaning back against the wall behind him. Dolph threw a pen at him. "You're coming to the gym with me."

"I always do."

"But not Hunter's gym."

"God, you aren't dragging me to one of those Crossfit places, are you?" Roman asked.

"Well, you know who works at that Crossfit place..."

* * *

><p><em><strong>Hey, Seth, this is Roman, Dolph gave me your number<strong>_

"Corey!"

Corey swung his head inside the small, admirable excuse for an office in the small gym he and Seth ran. The gym itself was fully functional, but the office was more a folding table with three mis-matched office chairs (that were all falling apart, thanks to Seth and his constant spinning). Seth had the biggest smile on his face, eyes fixed on his phone. Corey knew what was happening before Seth even told him, but he let the other man have his moment.

"Yes, Seth?"

"Roman has my number!" Seth said excitedly, fingers moving rapidly across the screen. "Dude, did you hook me up or something? Do I really need to get laid that bad?"

"It's less 'get laid' and more 'leave the apartment," Corey chuckled, making his way into the room and taking a seat in one of the office chairs. Seth continued to type. "Dude, don't text him a paragraph."

"I'm trying to find something to say, shut up," Seth snapped, earning another laugh from Corey.

"How about, 'I'm hot and desperate, please have sex with me,'" Big E Langston, the gym's resident motivator, walked in then, sitting down in the last chair.

Seth rolled his eyes. "I'm not desperate," He snapped, going back to staring at his phone.

"You know, instead of texting him, you could go out there and talk to him," Big E and Corey shared a grin that Seth didn't quite catch.

"He's out there?" Seth asked, earning a nod from both men. He stood up, nearly knocking over his chair in the process, and made his way out to the main part of the gym.

There Roman was, hair pulled back, shirt gone while he spotted Dolph. The blonde man obviously wasn't ready to lift something that heavy, so Roman had to help him up. Seth's eyes windened as he watched Roman's muscles work. He didn't know Roman was that well built. Whatever was under his shirt was certainly promising that day, but Seth wasn't expecting Roman to look so good.

"Go get him, tiger," Corey called from behind Seth.

Seth felt his cheeks heat up, but he walked forward, watching Dolph shove Roman lightly as he laughed. "Uh...hey, guys."

Roman looked up, a smile appearing on that beautiful face of his. Dolph must've took that as his leave, because he got up and walked over to Corey. Seth looked down at the ground, finally realizing that 1) he was practically alone with Roman and 2) they were both shirtless. _What a second meeting_, Seth thought.

"So, I didn't know you worked here," Roman said, taking a step towards Seth.

"Uh, yeah," Seth replied. "I'm surprised Dolph never told you, he's been coming here as long as I've been working here."

"He has the attention span of a goldfish," Roman chuckled, glancing over at the blonde. "But, really, it's not much of a shock that you work here."

"It pays the bills."

"And does wonders for a set of abs," Dolph walked up, throwing an arm around Seth's shoulders.

"Dolph-"

"Roman, didn't you want to ask Seth something?"

"Are you really making me do this-?"

"Roman!"

Roman sighed and looked at Seth, confused brown eyes landing on his. He smiled softly and Seth looked down, a smile on his own lips. "I did, actually."

Seth looked back up, Dolph slipping away once more. "You did?"

"Yeah," Roman nodded. "Uh...wow, that confidence is gone, um..." Seth's brown eyes looked almost childish with how much excitement they held. "Do you want to go on a date sometime?"

Roman practically held his breath, watching another puzzled expression contort Seth's face. For a horrifying second, Roman thought he was going to be rejected, until Seth nodded dumbly. "Yeah, I'd love to."

* * *

><p><em><strong>You wont regret this<strong>_

Roman shook his head at the 15th text Dolph sent him. He didn't exactly plan on regretting his date with Seth. Well, at least, not because of Seth. No matter how hard Roman tried, he couldn't stop thinking of Dean. Roman knew Dean should've been the last thing on his mind, especially when he had landed a date with Seth. Jesus, it was like a bad love triangle.

Roman pulled into the driveway, the last person he wanted to see in that moment's car parked right in from of him. Of all the nights for Dean to be home. Roman got out of his car and walked to the front door. When he opened it, he saw Dean sitting on the couch, three empty beers sitting on the coffee table while he stared at the blank TV. He merely glanced over at Roman, a dry chuckle falling from his lips as he took a swig from his last full bottle.

"Why is it," Dean began, his words barely slurred; he could hold his alcohol. "That whenever I come home for you, you're never here. I wait for you, but you aren't here."

"You haven't been here for the past month, Dean," Roman retorted, walking past Dean toward the stairs.

"You're fucking that blonde guy, aren't you?" Dean asked, standing up from his spot on the couch.

Roman stopped with one foot on the stairs, looking over his shoulder at Dean. "What?" He asked, turning around.

"You're fucking him!" Dean exclaimed, walking up to Roman. "You're always with him now. What else could you be doing?"

"Going to the fucking gym," Roman snapped, a muscle in his jaw ticking.

"I bet," Dean let out another chuckle. "Is he good? Is he better than me, is that it?"

Roman rolled his eyes. "I'm not dealing with you right now."

"Because you know I'm right," Dean continued to raise his voice, following Roman as he walked up the stairs.

"No, because you're practically drunk and talking out of your ass," Roman deadpanned.

The bigger man turned around and looked at Dean, the other's blue eyes suddenly filling with tears. Maybe he'd had more beers than Roman thought. Dean had a tendency to lose control of his emotions when he was drunk - most of the time, he just got really lovey-dovey - but every once in a while he'd burst into tears out of nowhere.

"What's so bad about me, Roman?"

Letting out a heavy sigh, Roman walked forward and placed a hand on Dean's face. "I'm not the one who's cheating here."

Before the tears could spill over, they were gone, and a look of horror passed over Dean's face. "Roman..."

"Go to sleep," Roman said. "I'll sleep on the couch, and we'll talk tomorrow."

Dean nodded wordlessly, backing away to the bedroom while Roman went back down the stairs. Why did have to say that? Roman couldn't help but hope Dean forgot about what he said. He didn't want to talk about Dean cheating. It was too early, it still hurt too much for Roman to acknowledge it. Dean could it's forget about it. He'd have a hangover anyways, it's not like he'd want to have a serious conversation.

They'd forget about it. Plain and simple.

* * *

><p>wow! late update! short update! garbage update!<p> 


	5. Avoiding The Truth

Dean sat up in bed with a groan, squinting against the harsh afternoon light. Why the fuck had he drank so much? All he remembered was coming home and Roman not being there. He grabbed a beer, fully set on just knocking one back and going to sleep. Next thing he knew, he'd downed an entire pack of beer and...he didn't remember much after that. Roman had come home at some point, right? It wasn't like him to stay out all night. Very vaguely, Dean could recall getting angry about something. What it was, he didn't know. Jesus, thinking was too painful.

Dean couldn't make himself focus on anything but the dull ache that had overtaken him. His head hurt, and the light hurt, and the faint smell of coffee was making him sick. He silently thanked his ability to function with a hangover (and the fact that Luke was working on weekends), dragging himself out of bed and into the bathroom. He brushed his teeth about as quickly as he could, and went downstairs.

The first thing he noticed was Roman. He was pacing the living room, but he hadn't noticed Dean yet. Dean stayed out on the stairs, crossing his arms.

"Dolph, he fucking chewed me out."

Dean raised an eyebrow. Who was Roman talking about? Did he get in trouble at work?

"He was decently drunk, but he pretty much said I was cheating on him."

Fuck.

"Exactly. I told him I wasn't the one who was cheating, and he got all serious and I made him go to sleep."

No more drinking. Ever. Period. He was in so much trouble. By the sound if it, Roman knew. Dean didn't even know how. He hadn't told anyone, and John...Dean didn't even know about John. Roman had mentioned talking to Randy, and Dean knew John and Randy were best friends...

_Shit_.

"I know...yes, I have to talk to him but-" Roman let out a long sigh. "I don't need you confronting me about this."

Dean took a few steps toward the kitchen as Roman turned around, but he stopped as he heard his boyfriend's quiet words.

"Maybe I don't want to admit that I'm losing him."

_Losing him_. Dean had made Roman think he was losing him. He felt a new wave of nausea, this one not because of the hangover. Dean didn't want to admit how bad he'd treated Roman in recent weeks. For almost two weeks straight, Dean didn't come home at night. He'd sneak in like a teenager at two or three in the morning, but Roman never said a word. By the time John had figured out that he was with Roman, they'd fixed up their nights together, and Dean was going home at much more reasonable hours. Even then, his behavior was suspicious. Roman started coming home a little later than usual and - yeah, Dean could see himself suspecting some less than respectable things from Roman.

Dean was _so_ fucked.

* * *

><p>"Hey, I'm surprised you're up," Roman said as he walked into the kitchen.<p>

Dean nodded silently, taking another sip of his wrong-side-of-lukewarm-coffee. It'd obviously been a while since Roman made it - it was past noon for god's sake. Roman sat in one of the tall chairs at the counter, leaning on his elbows as he looked at Dean. The other man didn't look up from his half-full mug.

"Dean?"

It was too soft to ignore. Too loving for his heart to not swell up with adoration. Roman knew about him and John yet he was still treating Dean like a lover. And yet, Dean had let himself cheat on this man.

"I don't think you're cheating on me," Dean said softly, forcing himself to tear his gaze away from Roman's eyes. "You're too good for that. I trust you."

"Okay," Roman reached out and smoothed down Dean's curly hair. "You know how I talked to Randy, right?"

Dean nodded, the dread finally sinking fully into him. "He told you."

"Yeah," Roman breathed out, eyes drifting down to the counter. He took a deep breath with a too-shaky exhale, and Dean felt it like a stab in the heart.

"I'm so sorry."

"Why?" Roman asked softly, grey eyes shining with tears. "Am I not enough? Am I not giving you something?"

"No, no, no, absolutely not, Rome," Dean braced his hands on the counter. "This isn't your fault. You didn't do anything."

"Then why'd you do it?"

Sighing, Dean walked around to the other side of the counter, Roman turning around to face him. "I love you, okay? I love you more than most people love anything-"

"You're rambling," Roman folded his arms across his chest.

"I slept with John. It was only once, at first," Dean placed a gentle hand on Roman's knee. "I was drunk, but he wasn't, and we had sex. I woke up in his bed and I swore that I'd never do it again."

"But you did."

"I did."

Roman bit his lip, looking away from Dean. That first, heartbreaking tear spilled over, and Dean felt himself pulling Roman into his arms before he could consider it. He felt the shoulder of his wrinkled shirt getting wet. Roman's big hands landed on his hips, but he was only being pushed away. God, even when he cried, Roman looked beautiful.

"I could be married to Randy by now, Dean."

The sound of that name had Dean's face heating up. "Why does that matter?"

"You didn't like him," Roman said, his voice lowering an octave. "So I left him. He loved me, you know that? I know for a fucking fact I would've been married to him."

"I don't get why you're bringing all this up," Dean said flatly, taking a step away from Roman.

"I let a future go for you, and now you're denying me of a future with you."

Dean didn't want to feel hurt by Roman's words, but it still cut through him like a knife. Roman was right. Randy was the type of guy you settled down with, and Roman was the type of guy who wanted to settle down. Dean just couldn't stand how well they worked.

Dean turned around and walked up the stairs. Roman wasn't going to want him around. It was easier for him to leave and the both of them to cool down than to stay together and be miserable. He grabbed his phone when he reached their room and - shit, he didn't even know what to grab. Did he pack a duffel bag? A backpack? He settled for the latter and took a backpack out of the closet, stuffing a few items in it and walking downstairs.

"I love you," Dean said, looking over his shoulder as he reached the front door.

Roman didn't say it back

* * *

><p>"God, man, you broke up?"<p>

Roman looked down at the table, feeling a new wave of something wash over him. Dolph's questions were inevitable, sure, but he wasn't prepared for them. He wasn't prepared for his boyfriend cheating and leaving him. Nobody comes prepared for that shit. It's the kind of stuff that's always there, lingering, haunting, but it's not a reality until it actually happens.

Dean hadn't made any effort to contact him. No visits, no calls, no texts, not even a passed on message. Nothing. The center of his universe just up and left. Yeah, they fought, which they very rarely ever did. Roman hated not knowing what was wrong with Dean. For 15 years, he always knew about Dean and everything that was Dean. Now there's nothing.

Somewhere deep, deep inside of him, Roman knew he did the right thing by confronting Dean. Though, it was eclipsed by the pain of losing him. Dean was his everything. He couldn't function properly without Dean being a pest. Dolph, expectedly, was making things no easier.

"You're overreacting," The blonde stated simply. "He just wants to be alone. He needs you more than you realize."

"How?" Roman asked, his voice coming out quiet and sharp and hurt and it had Dolph flinching, yet reaching out to wrap a hand around his wrist.

"I won't say you're a sugar daddy-"

"Are you fucking with me right now?"

"I'm kidding! Kidding, okay? Calm down," Dolph smoothed a hand down Roman's forearm. "He can't make it on his own, is what I mean."

"You're still saying he only needs me for my money," Roman replied blankly, pulling his arms out of Dolph's reach. "And stop petting me."

"I'm saying you're a sugar daddy right now, straight up, but not with money," Dolph earned a questioning eyebrow. "You're the steadiness he needs. Dean's too wild for his own good. Who knows where he'd be without you."

When Roman started working at the tattoo shop, Dolph would swear up and down that Dean was clinically insane which, no, he wasn't, he was just rough around the edges. And bad with people that weren't Roman. If anything, Dean was just an awkward little introvert. He didn't need (nor did he want) other people poking and prodding at him and giving him unnecessary attention. Roman, though, was an exception.

"He isn't fucking crazy, Dolph."

"I get that, but his sanity has nothing to do with you not being there to stop him from getting into a bar fight," Dolph merely crossed his arms. "Who's gonna bail his nutty ass out of jail?"

Roman's jaw ticked. It was a warning sort of motion, a don't say another word kind of thing. Dolph didn't stop.

"He'll come crawling back, all bruised and beat up and begging for your attention," Dolph smirked. "Maybe he'll get Cena beat right out of him."

Roman stood up then, leaving the cafe without another glance at Dolph. He didn't need any shit at that moment. While Dolph was a damn good friend, he had his callous moments. He wasn't afraid to be an asshole. Mostly because everyone already saw him as one, but that didn't matter.

As he left the cafe, Roman kept his head down. Winter was fast approaching, and a wicked cold snap was making its way through Chicago. He stuffed his hands in his pockets as he walked down the street, thankful for how close the shop was. He felt a bump against his shoulder, seeing the figure turn in his peripheral vision. Hoping the persons was willing to receive an earful instead of dish one out, Roman turned around.

"Oh, shit, Roman! Hey, wow, okay, I'm sorry about that," Seth was quickly apologizing, a startling look of fear on his face. Did Roman really look that pissed off?

"No, no, it's fine," Roman shakes his head. "You're all good."

Seth nods, a small smile fighting it's way onto his face. "Okay," He nods again - probably some nervous habit or something. "So, what's up? Is this the wrong time to talk?"

Roman wanted to yell 'yes' until his vocal chords bled, but his douchebag best friend and shitty boyfriend aren't of Seth's doing. Besides, the sheepish little look on his face was a little too much to be angry at.

"It's little cold out to be talking, huh?" Roman says, watching Seth just about deflate. "Hey, I still owe you a date. And, wow, my lunch break is pretty much over, but if you're still up for talking tomorrow, I'm good with going out."

Seth's brows furrow, but his expression soon smooths out. "Uh, yeah. Yeah! That's great. Tomorrow?"

"Awesome," Roman gives Seth a warm smile, watching the smaller man's face redden slightly. "My break starts at noon, I'll tell you where to go."

Seth nods again and Roman proceeds back to the shop, missing the bound-to-be embarrassing giggle let out by Seth.

* * *

><p>i honestly didn't plan on updating this week, but i got going on roman and dean's scene and i couldn't stop. happy new years! reviews are appreciated!<p> 


	6. First Date

His hands actually shook as he gripped the steering wheel. He was going on a date with someone who wasn't Dean. Of course, he and Dean had been on the down part of the roller coaster for a few days, but why did it feel so wrong? It's not like Dean would care if he went out with Seth. Dean had been cheating for the better part of a month.

Even so, he woke up in a bed that still smelled like Dean. He fished his clothes out of a closet that still held some of Dean's fancier clothes. He brushed his teeth while looking directly at the bottle of nice cologne Dean used every once in a while. He almost made a cup of plain black coffee for a Dean that wasn't there. Except, Dean was there. He was on everything. It was all him, but it wasn't.

Roman was slowly regretting ever telling Dean anything. He could've easily carried on, perfectly content with his cheating, lying boyfriend. At least he had Dean at that point. Now, there was nothing. Just a cold bed and some empty hangers and an extra few ounces of coffee in the pot. It wasn't fucking right.

Shaking his head, Roman pulled out of his driveway - their driveway, just without Dean's car - and drove to the shop. He couldn't focus on Dean. He had a job, he had a date for fuck's sake. He couldn't let Dean fuck up his chance with Seth.

After a short drive, Roman pulled into a spot and walked to the shop. He wasn't stopping for breakfast; he'd lost his appetite after a few days. Dolph shot him a warm smile as he walked in, Roman returning the sentiment as he made his way to his station. All he had planned was a small tattoo, and he'd be done. It was a pleasant surprise to see Phil and his fiancé, AJ, walk into the shop.

"Hey, Roman," Phil smiled at him and plopped down in the extra chair near his station.

"You ain't getting inked, Brooks?" Roman cocked a brow at the well-tattooed man, smiling at the petite woman who took a seat right in front of him.

"That Brooks isn't getting inked," AJ smirked a bit, looking at Phil. "I am."

Roman chuckled at the little display, AJ turning around to look at him. "So, what are we doing today?"

"Just some tally marks, nothing too hard," AJ said, handing him a piece of paper with what she wanted on it. "Back of my neck."

"Alright," Roman nodded, setting the paper on his lap and motioning for AJ to turn around.

15 minutes later, AJ's tattoo was halfway done and Phil decided to start grilling Roman, awesome.

"Hey, how are you and Ambrose?"

"Not too great."

"What did he do?"

"He cheated."

"No shit. With who?"

"Cena," Roman replied flatly. "I'm surprised you didn't hear about it."

"Dude, I don't work at the shop anymore," Phil said. "I'm working at the jiujitsu place down the street now. God, man, I'm sorry."

"It's fine," Roman shrugged, getting to the last few tallies on AJ's tattoo. "We're separated at the moment."

Phil nodded, keeping quiet for the rest of the time Roman worked. A few minutes later, AJ's tattoo was done, and she gave him a grateful smile as she pulled her hair into a bun.

"Thanks," She said, placing a hand on Roman's shoulder. "And, uh, good luck with your boyfriend. I'm on your side, if it counts."

Roman nodded and smiled at her, shaking Phil's hand as they made their way to the front of the shop. He waited until the bells on the door rung to walk to the counter. Dolph handed him a new magazine they got as he walked behind the counter. Since their little falling out the day before, Dolph had almost been walking on eggshells with Roman. He finally learned to watch his mouth, Roman thought.

"So, you have a date with Seth, right?" Dolph asked, turning around and looking at Roman. "Corey was telling me how excited he was. You have that boy whipped already."

Roman couldn't help but let out a little laugh. "He's cute," He said simply, looking over to Dolph. "I'm actually pretty excited."

"Should I tell Mark in advance that you're gonna come back an hour late?" Dolph teased. "Seth's mouth is probably gonna hold you up, and not just with talking."

"Shut up," Roman tossed the magazine at Dolph.

They talked about pretty much anything for a solid two hours, only stopping when one of Paige or Baron's customers came in. Before, Roman was excited for noon to arrive. But when it actually did arrive, he could feel his heart speeding up a bit. Why was he so nervous?

It didn't help Roman in the least when he arrived at the restaurant before Seth. The other man was almost ten minutes late when he did get there, and Roman seriously considered telling Dolph to give Mark that heads-up.

"Hey, okay, I'm sorry I'm late but I got lost and Corey made me do something at the gym and it took longer than I expected-"

"Hey, it's fine," Roman placed a hand on Seth's arm, not missing the way his eyes widened and his face reddened. "Go ahead and sit. I'm friendly."

Seth smiles and sits down, opening his mouth every few seconds, but not saying anything. A waiter came by and took their orders, but Seth still didn't say anything to Roman. When their drinks arrived, he played with the straw silently, occasionally looking up at Roman.

"You know, you sure are a chatty thing when you aren't on a date," Roman teased, Seth's doe eyes catching his.

"Oh! Oh, sorry," Seth bit his lip briefly, and Roman couldn't help but watch the little action. "It's just - did you feel forced into this? Like, with Dolph and Corey meddling and all that...?"

"No, Seth," Roman replied, his voice soft. "I wanted to ask you out, okay? I'm just a little wimp in a big body and I didn't know how to ask."

"So Dolph was helping?"

"Yes, in his own annoying little way," Roman chuckled, his smile getting even bigger as Seth laughed. God, it was one of the best noises Roman had heard in a while.

"I'm not good at talking," Seth said sheepishly.

"You sound fine to me," Again, Seth's bearded cheeks flushed, a deer-in-the-headlights look fighting onto his face. Seriously, when was the last time someone was nice to this guy?

Their food arrived after a few minutes, and they ate more than they talked, but Roman wasn't just letting Seth be quiet. He wanted to know about Seth. There had to be a reason he was so bashful, aside from being fucking adorable.

"Hey, you said you got lost on the way here," Roman said. "What's with that? This place seemed pretty easy to fine."

"Well, uh, I'm still fairly new here," Seth answered, pushing a strand of dark hair behind his ear. "To Chicago, I mean. I'm originally from Iowa, and I moved here with Corey a few months back."

"Is Corey from Iowa too?"

Seth shook his head. "Pennsylvania, but he moved to Iowa. It's weird," He shrugged and ate a french fry. "He knew Big E from somewhere, he got us a job at the gym, and that's the story."

Roman nodded, feeling himself become more and more entranced with Seth. That was a good sign, right? He was moving on.

"What about you?" Seth asked, resting his elbows on the table. "Are you from here?"

"No, I'm actually from Florida," Roman says, earning a nod from Seth. "I moved here - wow - about ten years ago. Me and my boy-" Roman stopped himself, letting out a deep breath. "My ex-boyfriend."

The little scene didn't go unnoticed by Seth, and he tentatively reached out a placed a hand on Roman's. "Sore subject?"

Roman quickly shook his head, giving Seth's hand a reassuring squeeze without thinking. "It's fine," He said, smiling at Seth. "I was with him for four years, and we broke up."

And, just like that, it was like a weight lifted off of Roman's shoulders. They weren't just separated. They broke up. It hurt, yeah, but it was comforting. It made Roman feel a little better and, judging by the look on Seth's face, it was comforting for him too. The smaller man smiled at Roman and give his hand another squeeze.

"Well, I'm glad you're okay."

"Yeah, me too."

* * *

><p>"So, did you get some?" Big E nudged Seth playfully, the smaller man chuckling and shaking his head.<p>

"If you count some hand-holding and a hug as "getting some," then yeah, I did."

Big E smiled and sat down in one of the well-worn office chairs. "So, he's a good guy?"

Thankfully, Seth had his hair down, and he could duck behind his own curtain to hide the look on his face. Roman wasn't just a good guy. He was amazing. He was sweet. He was kind and caring and patient and...everything Seth wasn't used to. Roman was something else, and Seth was almost angry at himself for underestimating the levels of perfect Roman was on. It was almost unhealthy.

Seth hadn't dated someone as great as Roman, well, ever. His ex-boyfriend, a big guy named Antonio, just wasn't a good person. He was rude, and he treated Seth like utter shit, hence moving to Chicago in the first place. Seth just wanted to get away. He didn't have any plans of tolerating Antonio for longer than he needed to. For a long time, Seth swore he wouldn't date anyone else. But Roman...he was going to change things for Seth.

"How about this, you got another date?" Big E asked again, obviously amused at Seth zoning out.

"I do, actually," Seth answered, sitting down across from E. "He's taking me to dinner on Friday."

"Making you wait," E commented.

"Ever heard of excitement?" Corey sauntered into the office, ruffling Seth's hair. "Seth's gonna be all happy and shit, and Roman's gonna be so endeared by him, he's gonna fuck the life out of dear Seth here."

"He isn't," Seth snapped. "He actually has class, thank you very much."

"Exactly, he's gonna ask you to be his boyfriend," Big E chimed in. "Then he's gonna fuck the life out of you."

Rolling his eyes, Seth stood up. "You two are horrible."

Their giggles followed him out of the office.

* * *

><p>As soon as Dean got in his car the night of his and Roman's fight, he immediately thought of John. He needed somewhere to go, why not crash with John? He'd done it before, he could do it again. No big deal.<p>

Though, he never took into consideration how bad of a decision staying with John was. He'd struck down all of his options as he walked from the front door to his car. Phil was finally settled down with AJ, he wouldn't want to be bothered. Dolph probably already knew everything and would've killed Dean. Sami had gone to visit some family with Adrian in, like, England or some shit. Cass and Enzo...those two fucked like rabbits, Dean could just _tell_ they did. Long story short, Dean went straight to John.

If only he'd sucked it up and bought some earplugs, he _so_ could've crashed with Cass and Enzo.

"This isn't right, Dean, and you know it," John said, crossing his arms as he leaned back on the couch. "Roman doesn't deserve this."

"Deserve what? A better life?" Dean snapped, stopping his pacing to look John in the eye. The older man was too fucking calm; it was pissing Dean off.

Sighing, John shook his head. "No," He stated simply. "He doesn't deserve to be left in he dark. You left without a word, Dean, how to you think Roman feels right now?"

Dean just ran a hand through his unruly hair and started pacing again. As much as Dean hated to admit it, John was right. Roman was too fucking good to be treated so harshly. Dean didn't reply to a single text, call, anything. After almost three days of their "separation," Dean finally stopped getting "I love you" texts. Maybe Roman finally gave up on him. It hurt like hell to think of it that way, but it was the truth. He had essentially been ignoring a man who didn't deserve it, but Dean knew he earned what he was getting. John had almost kicked him out already, but the overwhelming good-guy morals got the best of him.

"_I_ don't deserve _him_," Dean said simply, shaking his head.

"Dean..."

"I don't," The venom laced in Dean's tone had John just about wincing. "He's too good. He doesn't need me. He's gonna find some great guy and they'll settle down and get married and have kids. Roman'll get everything he's ever wanted," A dry chuckle fell from Dean's lips. "Everything I couldn't give him."

John didn't say anything. Dean didn't want to turn and look at him, at whatever look of pity he had on his face. He didn't want pity. What he really wanted was to go home, go to sleep, and wake up in Roman's arms. It would never happen, though, and he knew that. With his luck, Dean would probably get thrown out of the fucking bed. Sighing, Dean made his way to John's bedroom, where his bag was located. He grabbed it and made a beeline for John's front door.

Just as Dean's fingertips touched the doorknob, a hand was grabbing his wrist.

"Where are you going?"

"Home," Dean said, pulling his wrist from John's grasp. "You said it yourself, he doesn't deserve this. I'm going home, I'm talking to him-"

"And if he kicks you out?"

"I'll crash with Cass and Enzo."

John nodded and stepped back, allowing Dean to leave the house.

* * *

><p>I REALLY LIKE THE IDEA OF BASHFUL SETH SORRY. also, sorry for the late update; i was sick and had some family issues, but i'm okay now! reviews are greatly appreciated!<p> 


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